Growing Pains

Written By Jadon Ward

A School Project

Counselling, Kelowna, Vernon, Evergreen, Evergreen Counselling Group, Anxiety, Depression, Relationship, Marriage, Therapy, Contact, Contact Information, Kelowna Counselling, Counselling Kelowna, Growing, Growing Pains

When I think about growing pains there is one example that jumps out to me. One of my earliest recollections from my childhood was from a kindergarten unit on plants. I remember how the teach gave us each 1 or 2 bean seeds, as well as dirt and a small pot. My small, stubby fingers gently poked into the black dirt. Once I had made the hole, I did as my teacher instructed and placed the seed inside and covered it up. As we watered the pots, my classmates and I could hardly contain our excitement. "I can't wait till it sprouts! Mine is going to be the tallest in the class! I wonder how many beans I will get from it!"

When I came home with my special treasure, I was still buzzing. I recall trying to explain to my parents about what we did. I am sure that my explanation did not make much sense, but it did not take them too long to catch on once they saw the pot. Not trusting me inside with something I was intending to water, they made me put it on the porch outside. For me, the first couple days were filled with anxious anticipation. I watered the pot, then checked back every hour to see if anything had happened. As you might have guessed, nothing had! Despite all my hard work and care, I had nothing to show for my efforts.

As the days went on, I became increasingly less interested in my plant. I checked from time to time, but nothing was happening. I was sure of it! Eventually, I forgot about the pot altogether. As I played inside, the wet weather of my native Langley, BC ensured that my seed would be well-watered. While I may have forgotten about the pot, the seed that I had planted and nurtured continued to thrive.

That moment when you first witness new life is not easily forgotten. And so it was when I first glimpsed the shoot of green that seemed to have shot out of the black dirt overnight. I had only checked the plant in passing, not even really expecting something to happen. But it had happened. It was growing! The delicate stem curled gracefully, the seed covering its head like a helmet. And then a day later, the leaves unfurled to show their full glory! It is a memory that has stuck with me throughout my life, and has instilled in me a love of all things green.

Growth And Change

Watching the pot as a child, I saw change as binary . The seed was not growing, and then all of a sudden it was a plant, full of life! Little did I know that, under the surface, the seed was undergoing a radical transformation. Roots were forming and taking shape. The seedling was proceeding, slowly, inextricably, towards the surface, straining to reach the light. It was going through growing pains before finding real change. When it comes to how we view change as humans, I think sometimes we fall into the same trap that we did as children. We try something different in our routine - a new diet, or a different way of relating to others. But what happens? Often it is a similar experience to the one that I had as a kid. We see no instant impact, no immediate change. And so we stop trying to change. We give up on a process that is slowly coming to fruition, before the reality of transformation reveals itself.

I see this everyday with my counselling participants. I see this in the lives of my friends and family. And, if I'm being honest, I see this in my own life as well. People who are trying so hard to make positive changes for themselves and for others, buying into the lie that their efforts are in vain. That, because they have not seen the results today, this week, or this month, that nothing is happening. The simple fact is, change is slow. There are growing pains. But if we hold fast, the change is WORTH IT.

If you are feeling like you are struggling right now, to make positive, lasting change in your life, we get what you are going through. We want you to know that there is hope. That you will get through this place in your life. That, even if it doesn't look like it, the work and effort that you are putting in are not in vain. You are putting down roots that will lead to a better way of living for you and for those around you. When it sprouts, the change will seem dramatic to those around you. But you will know different. You know that the growing pains you went through were actually the key to your success!

Jadon Ward, MA, MA, RCC, CCC

Jadon Ward is a Registered Clinical Counsellor at Evergreen Counselling Group. He specializes in working with counselling participants to create a collaborate atmosphere conducive to change. He enjoys working with youth and young adults who are experiencing pressures that come with balancing school and life. He has a wonderful wife in Sarah, and has a passion for working with couples and marriages so they are places of care and strength.

Do you have an example of growing pains in your life?

We'd love to hear about it. If you want to share your story, or want to connect about counselling services, please fill out the contact form below!

Evergreen Counselling Group is proud to serve the communities of Kelowna, Vernon, West Kelowna, Lake Country, Armstrong, and the rest of the North Okanagan and Central Okanagan Regional Districts. “We acknowledge that our business is located on the traditional, ancestral, unseeded territory of the Syilx/Okanagan people.”

Jadon Ward
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